Anger Insight

Anger Insight

“Anger is a valuable emotion that tells us we need to address an issue. For some of us, it’s heard as a soft tone in the background, signalling that all is not right. Others don’t hear this signal that change is needed until it becomes a loud alarm bell. Either way, when recognised and understood, anger can be the first step toward problem resolution, providing us with the energy to right a wrong, stand up for an issue we believe in, or stay the course of managing conflict. Unfortunately, many of us…don’t use our anger for problem resolution. We simply don’t—or won’t—see that we’re angry or that the way we are expressing this feeling has become a problem in itself.”

- 'Taking Charge of Anger. How to Resolve Conflict, Sustain Relationships, and Express Yourself Without Losing Control' – W. Robert Nay, Phd

Anger is a valid emotion. As you can see from the above quote it can become a useful tool as an agent for change. In this way our anger is our own and is ignited by our own perception of the situation. When our anger is reactive in nature, that is, where it seems to have a life and energy of its own, it is likely to have been triggered from our past experiences of hurt and pain—emotional memories stored in our CNS (central nervous system) waiting to flood our system with cortisol and adrenalin to signal a red flag that we are in danger of being harmed/violated—yet once again!

Overtime, reactive anger becomes toxic in nature and will harm the environment and those we love. In our practice we provide a safe nurturing environment to help our clients identify their historical trigger point/s that ignites this toxic anger in a way that it will disrupt and disturb present experiences and relationships. Once this awareness becomes fully developed in the client they have the opportunity to become the owner and keeper of their triggers. Conversely, when the trigger owns the client (i.e. when the trigger is outside the conscious awareness of the client), it is silently waiting for a set of environmental cues for an opportunity to fire off, often with inconvenient timing, thus creating likely dire consequences in your present day-to-day life.

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